


We Go On

by mithrel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Blanket Permission, Episode Related, Episode Tag, Episode: s05e10 Abandon All Hope..., Gen, Podfic Welcome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-24
Updated: 2009-11-24
Packaged: 2017-11-13 14:03:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/504282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mithrel/pseuds/mithrel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Coda to 5x10: Abandon All Hope. Back at Bobby’s, Sam and Dean talk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Go On

Dean sat at Bobby’s kitchen table, needlessly sharpening a knife. Sam sat near him, with a look of concern on his face.

Bobby had gone to bed several hours before, but the idea of sleeping made Dean wince. He didn’t need more nightmares.

Sam had waited with him, thankfully silent. Dean knew that sooner or later he was going to want to Talk, which wasn’t gonna happen.

Sure enough, a moment later Sam sighed and said, “Dean…”

“Not happening, Sammy,” he said flatly. He wasn’t going to talk about the disastrous attempt to kill Lucifer. Wasn’t going to talk about Ellen. Wasn’t going to talk about Jo.

“You need to talk about this,” his brother persisted.

“No, I don’t. I’m fine.”

Sam glared at him. “Like hell you are! You’re doing your whole ‘repress-ignore-deny’ thing, and normally that’d be fine, but if we’re gonna win this thing you can’t be distracted. It’ll get someone killed!”

“People have already been killed!” he yelled before he could stop himself. Jo…she couldn’t hack the life, she wasn’t a hunter, not really. She hadn’t faced a quarter of the shit they had; she was young, she hadn’t realized she could be hurt. And Ellen…she was the closest thing he’d known to a mother since he was four years old.

Sam didn’t say anything, and he shook his head. “This is my fault.”

“ _Your_ fault?” Sam repeated incredulously. “How the hell do you figure that?”

“She was shooting at the hellhound that got me when she was torn up!”

“That _does not_ make it your fault! Jo was an adult, she knew what was at stake! It was her choice to come along, and her choice to go after the hellhounds!”

Dean shook his head. Sam didn’t get it. He was upset about Jo and Ellen, sure, and he’d grieve for them when he had the time. But there wasn’t time now. Dean wondered when they’d switched places; usually he was the one ignoring his own emotions until the job was done.

“It didn’t do any good,” he said hollowly. “Jo, Ellen…they died for nothing.”

“They got the hellhounds off us,” Sam pointed out.

“Fat lot of good that did. The Colt didn’t work and now Death is walking abroad.”

Sam shook his head. “So we got our asses kicked. So, what, now we’re just going to roll over and let Lucifer do whatever the fuck he wants?”

Dean thought of Jo’s face as he left her with the bomb, brave and doomed, thought of the flames creeping over the photograph. “No way in hell.”

Sam nodded tightly and clapped him on the shoulder.


End file.
